my clients’ experiences with the DateWise Program and Coaching
“The small things the DateWise program gave me were some of the most important. Writing out and deeply thinking about specific feelings helped me realize my past pattern of picking the wrong types of men. It helped me figure out why I was reacting to certain dating and relationship situations, and how to change behaviors that were not positive or healthy.
“This process helped me hold myself accountable for making decisions that are best for me. It helped me realize I am a gift for my partner and the value I bring to the relationship.
“Jen’s coaching was supportive, positive, caring and professional. I appreciated the honest and direct advice. I felt like she truly cared about my dating process and finding a true, loving mate. We had some good laughs along the way as well!”
“Although I was very open to the idea of finding a new partner, I was terrified of the process. Meeting and engaging with potential new partners wasn’t easy for me, since I’d been away from the dating world for decades. Jen’s matter-of-fact manner and concrete, practical suggestions (and encouragement) helped so much. She gave me courage.
“The whole idea of engaging through social media and dating sites was alien to me, and seemed confusing and a little dangerous. It was a new world. But Jen’s careful explanation of how to apply rules to engage these tools in a safe and productive way was priceless! She is low-key, practical, supportive and gentle.
“The Seven Steps to Love exercises made me introspective about my past life, and forced me to focus with some specificity about the kind of person I wanted to meet, what I had to offer to him, and how I saw my life developing in the future.”
“About six months ago, I met someone. I had incredible butterflies. I was sure he was IT. I dove in with both feet. It was just too exciting and I didn’t want to slow down. It was magic. I just had to do it! Guess what? It exploded as fast as it started … and that’s when I started working with Jen.
Now I understand what she’s been telling me about the butterflies—what they are and what they do. They are possibly the most poorly understood and dangerous emotional tools I have. I always thought the flutters in my chest and brain were good things. That they meant someone special had arrived in my life and that he’d make all bad things disappear. Life would suddenly and magically change. And that’s how I’d find love…if I was destined to find it at all.
Lots of really smart ladies like me secretly wait for magic. We think that magic is the only way we will find love or a partner. The regular ways have never worked and we’re positive they never will. And honestly we’re probably right about that. But we are wrong to wait for magic to happen. We crave “big love” and we want to keep romance alive as a possibility. And here’s where the big mistake happens—we think the feeling of butterflies means that we are in the presence of magic.” Read Tamara’s Seven Steps to Love Step 2 Progress
“Words cannot express how grateful and appreciative I am for having the opportunity to work with Jen and her Seven Steps to Love program. Before I met Jen I was actively dating. My desires and goals for the past 4 years have been to meet the one. I was constantly going on first dates and had been involved in two short-term relationships in between. I thought I was doing the right thing, but I kept struggling with meeting someone that I could truly connect with as a long term partner. And then I met Jen and so much changed for me.
“I really appreciated the program and the structure and guidance it provided. The program and exercises really helped tap into my past relationships with family, friends, and exes. By going through the exercises I was able to identify patterns and experiences that have significantly impacted my approach to dating.
“For example, I realized from completing Step 1 in the program, that as a child I had a difficult time expressing emotions to my family – specifically feelings of being sad or upset. I learned that I was repeating this same pattern in my existing relationships. The same discomfort and unease I had in expressing these emotions to my family, was the same reservations I had in opening up with my partners and even friends. I do not believe I would have ever come to this realization on my own (regardless of all the self-help books I have read etc.). Following the structure of the program and taking the time to do the exercises, really helped bring these things to the forefront.” Read Yelena’s full story
“After my husband passed away, I knew I wanted a change, but I just had no idea how to get there. The Seven Steps to Love program, along with Jen’s coaching, gave me the confidence to move forward with dating after 32 wonderful years of marriage. It gave me the tools to help me figure out what I wanted in my life and how to get there.
“Knowing Jen was available as a sounding board helped boost my confidence. Her style is very straightforward and firm, yet at the same time supportive. She always gently held me accountable. The biggest thing was getting clear about what I was looking for in a new relationship. Putting that on paper kept me focused throughout the dating process — something I’d never done before.
“Making space in my life for someone new was also very important, since I was in a slightly different situation than most women, dating as a widow. I didn’t realize I needed to both physically and mentally clear space. This helped me to recreate a new me, unencumbered by the spouse I was in the past.”
Ready for your success in love?
“Jen’s Seven Steps to Love program helped by giving me a sense that dating again did not have to feel out of control or random. I had to dig deep and work to understand what was behind my past choices. I realized my biases about who appeals to me versus who would be a good partner for me.
“This program provided me a structure to work through and helped clarify what I want in a long-term relationship, before the dating starts. Having a game plan made me feel I was in control of the process.
“Reviewing my target behaviors has helped me hone in on behaviors and beliefs that have not worked for me in the past. Thinking about what hasn’t worked or “deal breakers,” and “flipping” them into positives helped me look for what is good in potential partners.
“Jen provides great tools and personal guidance for getting out there, knowing what you want and having some solid stepping stones along the way. As a coach she is an intuitive listener and her feedback is always what I need in terms of dating.”
“Before working with Jen, I was a little bit stymied by how to write my profile, how to set up a date, what to talk about and how to make a graceful exit. But Jen had a lot of concrete and practical advice that allowed me to think it through and realize that it was totally doable.
“Knowing that I had a coaching session with Jen spurred me to finish writing my profile and actually sign up for dating sites. Without her coaching, I don’t think I would have done it by now—as I had been planning to do it since about 2010. I knew that talking to Jen would be engaging and help me overcome my hurdles—it was more than just a monitoring device.
“Envisioning a relationship worth working for was very important to me. I have a demanding schedule and enough good friends who I love spending time with, so much so, that it’s a challenge for me to think about setting aside time to meet someone new. However, the wonderful exercise for envisioning the ideal and real relationship and writing a narrative to set my intentions helped me get over that enough to actually go out on several dates and I’m sticking with it.
“Jen’s coaching style is directive, yet responsive to me and my situation. At the same time, she is not judgmental. In general, it’s great fun to talk to Jen about dating, relationships, love, and all that surrounds those topics because she is smart, thoughtful and engaged.”