Why do I [describe the pattern]? I could end up having more relationships or be in one regardless of how perfect or not it feels. Not listening to my intuition or taking the time to find the partner that is the best possible match. Really learning to trust myself and what I know is best for me. This is radical self care and will set me up to be with someone who will be the right fit for me. Passing someone by because they don’t seem good enough, overthinking everything, and taking my overthinking as intuition when it isn’t. I have done this with friends, therapist, etc. Yes! I think being really clear about what I like, what I don’t like about the person and checking in as things go along and really making sure it all feels inline, and if it doesn’t not being afraid to let it go and trust in that. Taking care of myself in situations with friends, work, etc. and leaving situations that are toxic for me. Then I will have confidence that I am making the correct decisions. I might doubt myself. When I start dating for sure. I stayed in my last relationship even though a big part of me knew he wasn’t the best fit for me. I know I tend to ignore red flags when I feel immediate chemistry with someone. I have ended interacting with a few dates but mostly have experienced being left even if I think I should. I’m wanting to have the confidence to trust that if I need to leave a relationship I will and in a timely fashion. I have been doing this in friend/work situations already. Energy work session. Learning from the experience, hopefully sooner than the last time, and moving on. I think anything that is different and new takes some time to adjust to and make a habit. I think it can be hard to tell someone your concerns and I can be concerned about hurting someones feelings and I need to put myself first. Very good!
stay in relationships I know are not the best fit for me or wait longer than I should before getting out of them.
Potential positives of not changing my pattern:
Potential negatives of not changing my pattern:
Potential positives of changing my pattern:
Potential negatives of changing my pattern:
What can I do to learn about my pattern and who can I discuss this with?
Am I ready to declare my commitment to change?
What can I do to prepare, such as what will I do and say differently than before?
How can I practice before I try this?
What if my action or conversation goes well?
What if it doesn’t go well? What might the consequence be?
When and where will I try out my new way of changing my pattern?
I’m letting go of my old pattern, and embracing the new one:
Where else in my life can I use this new pattern?
How do I reward myself for continuing the process of change?
Ways I slipped back to my old ways, and how I handled the relapse (if applicable):
What is difficult about maintaining my new pattern?
How do I feel about changing my pattern?